My son was born January 31, 2017. He’s almost 14 months old, and I’m pretty proud of my wife and me: Julian is happy and healthy, and he’s only been caught with a pair of scissors once. Just kidding—it was twice. Our first year with a new baby felt like organized chaos mixed with a dumpster fire: sleepless nights, colic, blowouts, endless feedings, late-night “how to swaddle” searches, walks in a blizzard to soothe him, more blowouts, and messes you wouldn’t believe. In hindsight, Lisa and I did a pretty good job.
Lifting heavy stuff wasn’t exactly top of mind during that period, but here are a few notes on what most dads can expect from training in year one.
I’ll admit I’m something of an outlier. I’ll wax poetic about how training often takes a backseat to life as a dad, but this past year was actually one of my best training years, culminating in a long-time goal: a 600 lb deadlift. Forty years old, a nine-month-old at home—that combination feels like a humblebrag worth sharing.
To put things in perspective: I work in a gym, I had a wonderful support system, and I did implement much of what I’m about to describe. I’m also pretty serious about training.
1. EXPECTATION MANAGEMENT
Let’s cut to the chase: training 5-6 times per week right after a baby is born isn’t realistic or productive. You can do it, but the quality will suffer. It helps to manage expectations in the weeks (and months) after birth. Think less about chasing multiple goals and more about getting through a short period without crashing. In short, the goal is a minimal effective dose.
For most guys, a reasonable aim is 2-3 full-body sessions per week, focused on the compound lifts.
2. WHAT DOES MINIMAL EFFECTIVE DOSE EVEN MEAN?
It means doing just enough to create a training effect without pounding yourself. With stress and sleep deprivation, reducing volume and intensity is wise. You don’t have to crush yourself to progress or even maintain. For many, those 2-3 sessions per week can be highly productive. Interestingly, there’s a window of about 30 ± 5 days to maintain maximal strength, so you don’t need to train hard every single day. In practice, I stayed mostly in the 60-85% range, with a few 90-95% efforts every 3-4 weeks.
3. A PRACTICAL PLAN YOU CAN ACTUALLY FOLLOW
I can respect that some readers care less about being strong. I wrote a piece a while back for BodyBuilding.com aimed at new dads, describing a simple 2-3x per week program you can follow without it feeling overwhelming. Highlights include:
– EDM (Estimated Daily Max) Sets: Use a bit of auto-regulation to account for daily energy and recovery. The idea is to lift challenging weights without fighting your current state.
Example: Squat variation — 5 EDM; then 3×3 at the same weight. Nine reps that are crisp and fast, at roughly 65-70%.
– Embrace some bodybuilding work to stay motivated, aid recovery, and keep training efficient. For instance, a short finisher like dumbbell hammer curls for six minutes with 15-second rests, or density sets where you pair two or three exercises for 8–12 minutes.
Lower body example: dumbbell goblet step-ups 8 per leg; cable pull-through 10; foam roller bodysaw 10.
Upper body example: dumbbell bench press 8; TRX row 12; finishing movement per side.
The exact exercises aren’t as important as choosing movements that fit your goals, injuries, and equipment. Workouts don’t have to be marathon sessions; 30 minutes can be plenty.
– Sub-maximal training works, trust me: training at 60-85% of 1RM builds strength with less joint wear, even outside the baby-in-the-house setting.
– Walking will help more than you might think: when the baby won’t sleep or is unsettled, a brisk walk can reset your mood and provide solid Zone 2 work. I’d strap Julian into the stroller, queue a podcast, and walk around the neighborhood. Those walks also sparked the “popup Julian” videos I’d send my wife during her workdays.
– Teamwork and asking for help: my wife is incredible, and we shared childcare to make time for training. We’re a team, and it’s perfectly okay to ask for help or to delegate tasks—hire someone to write your programs if needed. Even Batman had Alfred.
– You’re going to fail—and that’s normal: there will be days you skip training or reach for pizza. That’s part of the process. A fellow dad and coach reminded me: you’re going to fail, and that’s okay. Postpartum training is a specialized topic; seek guidance from experts (for example, Dr. Sarah Duvall) and check out related posts I’ve written and my wife’s pieces about training through pregnancy and after.
And yes, I still find moments to nod at other dads I see around town.
